‘round and around

so I’m back at the beginning
watching through the little piece of sky I own.
Right where I got struck by lightning
in the place where I first felt on my own.

But I can’t control the clouds, no
I can’t control the weather.
My mind blurry with doubts like
how the hell I’ll make this better?

So I take another cigarrete, this one I borrowed
and the movie scene throws me off my feet.
Halfway through, my heart feels hollow
am I lighting it up ´cause I can’t find my heat?

In a second, dark comes crawling again
revealing every version of myself I’ve ever been
’Remember them? Who are you, then?’
and that’s when the moonless sky got clean.

‘You used to dance, all the time’
a twinkle sound traveled my bones
There she was, waiting, like my rhyme
and crumbled everything I’d built in stone

All that screaming, all my sound
I am banging, I’m rebelling
blaming her: she let me drown
I am nothing… without her I am nothing.

And the clouds take her from me once more
back at the beginning but this feels odd
I see darkness, it’s different than before
it feels warm and it holds me while I sob.